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I brought Dwight (my accordion) to our Music Together class yesterday. I had worked up simple arrangements of three songs from the current songbook, and accompanied the class while they sang and danced. (I sang along where possible too, but was thinking too hard most of the time.) It was so much fun, I'm looking forward to doing it again sometime. I also want to bring the uke in at some point.

After class we went to Verizon Wireless to look at the new Droid, which Laura went ahead and bought. (I'm officially jealous. I love my Samsung Flipshot, but man is that thing sexy.) The kids entertained the sales guys by pretending to talk on the dummy model phones throughout the store. One of the guys went in back and got a couple of discontinued models, and gave them to the kids as toys. They were so proud. They've been making pretend phonecalls on them ever since.

Then, next door to Verizon is a Tae Kwon Do school, and they were celebrating their fourth anniversary with free food, demonstrations, a bounce house, and cake. The kids had a ball and wore themselves out. Riley was imitating the demonstrators, kicking and shouting an approximation of "hyah!" We got to thinking about how martial arts would teach a lot of the things that Riley needs most: confidence, discipline, focus. We spoke with the manager, and she was very supportive, saying they work with special needs kids all the time. She set Riley up with an instructor -- a teenage boy who surprised us by being really good with Riley. We signed Riley up for classes. He seems excited about it, we're hopeful he'll participate well.

(Of course, as I typed this he was screaming his lungs out, in protest of being sent to "quiet time" for having screamed about having to wear non-preferred underwear because he wet his Spongebob ones. So we shall see. Rome wasn't built in a day and so on.)

This morning when Laura brought the kids in to wake me up, Riley said "Happy Fathers Day!" Lydia thought for a moment and said "Happy Birthday!" We all laughed. Laura assures me she had nailed it in rehearsal.

We had some yummy muffins to tide us over 'til brunch, then took the bikes to the shady park for a while. It was already nice and warm out, enough that the wind felt perfect. Lydia's getting brave with climbing, it can be a little nerve-wracking to watch.

Back to the house for brunch. Laura made me huevos rancheros. My brother-in-law came over and helped, and stayed to hang out with us all day. Lydia napped for a while, during which time I fiddled with bike accessories. Laura helped Riley with his own little bike, and he sweetly decided he wants to pull Lydia in the trailer behind him.

When the nap was over, we all went to the neighborhood pool here in our subdivision. We hadn't been yet. The kids had a ball and wore themselves out. Lydia indicated that she wanted to swim herself in the big pool, rather than being held, so I faced her away from me, held her up by her bottom and balanced her under the water. She is now 100% confident in her fictitious ability to swim. Her proud little smile is just impossibly endearing.

We had takeout barbecue for dinner. Riley was really tired, but super sweet to me. He rested his head on my hand for a bit, and melted my heart. (He's not like that often, and certainly not with me when he's got his Mommy right there.)

The day was one enormous gift. I wish I could box it up.

( The menu )

My mom's here visiting for the weekend, she got here last night. Riley's been pretty open with her, right from the beginning, which is great to see. He's interacting with her on a level that he hasn't before, it gives me hope that his communication issues are on the way out. Lydia showed some predictable skepticism of Mom at first but is warming to her quickly.

Thanksgiving might be my favorite holiday. It's so laid back, free of expectations. It's about appreciating, sharing, and food, and nothing else. It's a pity that it's perpetually eclipsed by Christmas in terms of travelling home. Hmm, maybe I should stop letting it be.

Been meaning to post this for a few days, but only just got these photos online. Riley did a reprise of his bat costume from last year, since it still fits him just fine. Lydia went as a jack-o'lantern.

We kicked off the day with a party at Riley's school. Both kids were a little intimidated by the din when we got there, but got into the swing of things pretty quick. Riley and I ran hopped a sack race, and decorated little picture frames with foam stickers, but he was really all about the bounce house. (It's funny, all those times at Little Gym he never trusted the big air mat, he'd grow extra arms to hold onto me rather than bounce around on it with the other kids. But he could not get enough of this bounce house. Man, what a year will do.) Poor Lydia got pretty worn out exploring the party, she passed out almost as soon as I started the van.

We carved the pumpkins in the afternoon. I got a little round white one from Home Depot, with the idea of doing it as a skull. I drew the face with a sharpie, and it turned out pretty cool, then I couldn't bring myself to carve it out. I am curious how it would look carved, but it would be rather time consuming to try it with all the teeth.

Some of our neighbors had a cookout in their driveway, so that was our first stop trick-or-treating. The kids had a great time playing there. Eventually we visited all the lit houses on our block, by which time both kids were exhausted.

We had a few handfuls of trick-or-treaters come to our door over the course of the evening, most of whom were delightful. There were a few teens with no apparent costume, some of those weren't even accompanying little siblings or anything. I gave them candy anyway -- I mean at least they're out doing this instead of drugs or whatever -- but it always feels kinda like extortion. Which got me thinking that trick-or-treating really started out that way anyway, so there's no point resenting them for it.

(Ack, this post has been sitting half-finished in Semagic for way too long. :P Time I got back on the LJ horse. Probably also time I thought of a better metaphor.)

Riley had his third birthday. They gave him a little party at school, we all sang for him and ate those little school cups of foamy vanilla ice cream. He was happy to have me there, it was really sweet. And he's been treating me better overall, we're seeing lots of gradual improvement in his behavior in general. On Saturday we had our family birthday party for him, out at his grandparents' place in the country. He had fun with his new garden tools, he helped his mom plant some flowers. He really loved the toy fishing pole and fish we got him.

For his birthday cake I did Devil's Food, because he is, as he would say, a "handsome debbil." It took a while to do from scratch, with Cook's Illustrated's usual level of mild overcomplication, but it turned out impossibly light and velvety. I would do it again for an occasion like this.

I think I tend to forget how young Riley is, because he's so intellligent and articulate. When I think about other toddlers I've known, I worry that I've expected too much of him. On the other hand, none of those others has been quite like him; seems like they're probably not a very good barometer anyway.

And then Lydia turned a year old almost a week later. Her party was out at the grandparents' too. She didn't care much for Riley's birthday cake, so we went with an ice cream cake for her. She loved it of course. We got her a stuffed cow which we named MooMoo, and a toy tractor and barn. MooMoo's not her favorite bedtime buddy, but she has a special place in Lydia's pre-bedtime routine now.

This is Riley reading a bit from one of his current favorite books: Oozey Octopus, a Tale of a Clever Critter. At any given moment there are a dozen books that he has memorized better than this. I've added subtitles because if you don't know the books he's quoting, it can be hard to understand him.

Today was rough. Riley got another stomach bug, his second since we moved here. He spent the morning throwing up, clinging to me like a cobweb and crying pitifully for milk and food that I didn't dare give him. The pediatrician gave him a shot of Zofran. That's probably over-treating him by a fair amount; by the time we got back to the house, he was feeling better enough to start acting like a tyrant. :P He wouldn't drink his Walgreens-brand clone of Pedialyte, but he did have enough good ol' water that hopefully he'll be fine in the morning. Poor little guy.

A while ago I got Riley this Sesame Street alphabet album. It's essentially the same as a vinyl LP that I had at his age, except with a token Elmo song tacked onto the beginning so they could justify putting him on the new cover art. My LP had a couple of nasty scratches in it too. But it was one of several Sesame Street albums that I pumped into my ears as often as the parents would let me for a few years.

I've loved hearing it again (skipping right over Elmo, hehe). The familiar songs feel mostly the same, but also my perspective is obviously a bit different now. As a kid I wasn't yet able to really appreciate how well done the songs are, plus they were so effective in drawing me in that I wouldn't have really analyzed them anyway. But a couple of them are pretty complex musically, and of course the whole thing is sprinkled with humor that is too advanced for toddlers. You get the feeling that Jim Henson and company were trying to keep themselves entertained along with the kids. That's exactly what I like about TMBG's kids music too, of course. Riley seems to like these as much as I did/do.

But thinking about the Muppets, I also realized how much it says about their relationship that Ernie has articulated hands, while Bert has articulated eyebrows instead. They're basically doomed by phenotype into their roles in the actor/reactor dichotomy. (I'm a Bert by that measure. And by several others, I think.)

This morning, Riley tripped over a toy on the floor. That's a fairly commonplace event for our gung ho little guy. But this time he happened to be holding a sippy cup in his mouth with both hands. He continued holding onto the cup, which hit the floor squarely and transferred all the force of the fall straight to his mouth.

( Long story short: two of his teeth will probably end up darkened and remain crooked, but at least they're likely to stay in, and of course they're just baby teeth anyway. )

So it could all be much worse. But it's still got me in quite a funk. I've been beating myself up about it all day. I was standing three feet away from him at the time. But I couldn't reach him in time to stop it. I saw the fall happen in slow motion. There was nothing I could do, I tell myself over and over. I am completely certain of this, and yet I don't wholly believe it. I'm responsible for him, ergo it is my fault. I just need some perspective, the kind that only time can give me.

He was feeling all right, considering it all, for most of the day. He smiled a bit, several times this afternoon, which makes me feel better. Although it also makes me sad, because it's a very different smile than he had yesterday.

Right now he's sleeping fitfully in the next room. His ibuprofen surely must have worn off by now, but I think I should let him sleep for as long as he can before I give him another dose. I don't feel much like sleeping myself. It's going to be a long night to cap off a long bad day.

They say that time is relative, and I believe it. In blatant defiance of my own temporal perception, Riley turned one year old today. I can't believe he was ever that small, and yet it can't have been more than a few weeks ago, can it?

I'm really enjoying being at home with him. I'm so glad I have the chance.

He's doing great. I could say he's walking, in that he does take some steps without support, but he's not yet stable enough to walk everywhere he goes. It won't be long though. His main problem is that his steps are too big.

He's pretty vocal, and he likes communicating with us. He parrots us a lot without knowing what he's saying, but he also clearly and consistently uses words to communicate. He recognizes even more words than he uses himself.

( A beginner's guide to Rilese. )

We had his birthday party here at the house, with about 15 adults and six kids. Everyone seemed to have a good time. Lots of good (and relatively simple) food. Knowing how Riley likes bananas, I decided on a banana chiffon birthday cake. And knowing how his mom and I like chocolate, I topped it with ganache instead of a glaze. :) It was delicious. (The only problem with it as a first birthday cake was that, being a tube cake, it hasn't got a center where you could put a single candle, so the candle placement had to be asymmetrical and looked a little funny. Any other year, you'd be able to balance it.)

( Here's the recipe. )